Breathe.

"Breathe" is the title of one of the songs I listen to every morning on my way to class. It's from the "In the Heights" soundtrack. I don't know why, but there's some type of connection with it. I need to listen to it at least once a day - usually in the morning. So weird, but hey, whatever, it works. And, honestly, after the last few days fiasco, breathing is all I can do. Just breathe.

Here's the situation with the Bank card. Apparently Russia put an international block on all debit and ATM transactions with National City, which is why I could not use it. After hours of drama, e-mails between Nicholas, me, and mom, phone calls to the bank, to our correspondance at the bank, to another number at the bank - we came up with a solution...well, EJ did. He gave me his account number and mom put money in his account and he withdrew it today. So, I have money. No worries, it was just a rough uphill climb to get there with a lot of stress...and unnecessary and stupid stress because this shouldn't have happened. Stupid banks. ha. Everything works out. Gotta have faith.

Today we had our last ballet class. We combined the class with both groups. We did our warm ups and dances first. They weren't bad. I wish I would have done a little better, but ya know, whatever. I was fine. I'm just too much of a perfectionist...as ALL OF YOU know. Afterwards, I gave Larissa like 5 hugs at different times because this woman is amazing and I didn't want it to be over. She is so brilliant. She told me to keep dancing and make sure I learn these crazy jump spin things. She told me she wanted to get me to jumps and spins, but not enough time, and that she really enjoyed having me in class. P.S. new news about her. Apparently she was prima ballerina at the Bolshoi for 22 YEARS which is twice the normal amount of time a prima ballerina is there. Also, she choreographed for many Russian films and was in some as well. She is such an amazing woman and I feel privileged I was able to learn from her in my life.

I can't believe this is all coming to an end. I've learned so much and have become a whole different person I think. Before I came, I was beginning to get into movement and dance aspects of theatre, but now, I know that that is where I need to be. I need to take classes and keep improving after this trip. I love it all and this is my strongpoint right now so I need to embellish it.

Chekhov class today was neat. Someone would pose on the chair and someone else would have to come up and pose with them and name the picture. Then that person would stay and the previous person would leave, but a new person would come and invent a new story. It was dealing with psychological gestures and how your imagination can work to invent all of these new situations. The next time we did it, you had to keep adding on to build a new picture, however, every picture had to be of different content and name with the same poses, though. Sounds confusing, but it makes sense because you can change the meaning of something or the way something looks because of your interpretation of it.

The next exercise was to go up front and be a character from The Seagull with no words and the class had to pick who you were...no words, just because of the character youbecome. Inorder for the audience to understand you and see the character, you have to live it and embody it. For some this was easy, but for others it was more difficult. You must have an event and a forward motion, gesture - something that makes you live the character instead of just sitting and waiting. This was a very interesting exercise. You could tell the characters by the physicality, rhythm - fast or slow, or song. We had to hum a tune or sing a song that represented the character also. Finding the character's inner song was cool because it connected to their inner motivations and self and kept the character grounded and free.

Acting was good today. We did an etude from The Segull. It was that Arkadina had a closing party for her show and everyone was in attendance and the event was that she was introducing Konstantin and he blew up and yelled and made a big scene. Changed the scene to that of discomfort. We didn't rush right out after, but instead, each character found a way to dealwith this awkwardness whether by taking a sip of the drink, looking other way, conferring with friend, whatever. The response was good change of atmosphere, great character definition/relationships, not rushing.

The interesting thing I'm finding is that I've been trying to figure out what I've learned so far here in Acting because we do the same things everyday. But that's the thing, we do the same thing - perfecting our craft. I've never thought it was useless at all, but I didn't see results like I could in movement, dance, or singing, probably because this was the only class we have everyday. I realized today that I've expanded on the ability to create a character, explore all possiblities of this character, establish relationships with other characters, and live in the moment - all happening organically and naturally and not rehearsed. It's a beautiful thing, but difficult. I used to think way too much when in these situations. You need to let your mind free and go with your soul/gut leads you.

Last night we watched Sergei's (our instructor) 2nd year class's showcase. It was all etudes. ha ha. Go figure, right? It was pretty incredible. They made rain and a thunderstorm with nothing but their hands, fingers, and mouths. It was amazing how believable it was. They then did object and animal etudes (like we have done, also). One that sticks out is that there were 6 girls in a row as guitar strings. There was someone offstage playing guitar. Everytime that string was plucked, that girl would move her body. He played a song and they all moved accordingly, so amazing to watch. Then one string broke. She left and was replaced by a guy string. It was just really cool to see the personalities a guitar string might have because no one thinks of it. Being an actor, it's important to give everything a personality and a story; every object has a story - where it came from, who it was created by, how old it is, where it is now, what it's gone through, what it thinks of the world, etc. So fascinating to think about and get into. Others that were interesting were a pack of wolves, marionettes, bees. For the human parody ones, they parodied auditionees for the MXAT. Hilarious - there the was the gangster, freak, too nervous to speak, and nerdy one. Different variations of teachers - old, intelligent, and eccentric. Then they did famous people. A boy band where they ended up having watering cans pouring water on them, fans flowing their hair - HILARIOUS. Enrique Iglesias with 4 beautiful women and him getting scared. Britney Spears going from somewhat conservative Baby One More Time to stripping clothes off for You Drive Me Crazy. Hilarious to watch, as well. It ended with Gloria Gaynor. The character study these kids must have done on these specific individuals had to have been intense because they had details down to the lip quiver and head nods. So funny to watch and incredible to see where you can be led with the guidance of such exercises as etudes.

On another note, today we were complimenting Sergei on his class and he told us that 25 of them were in the show last night and 6 were dismissed today, so now their class is down to 19. It began at 32 at the beginning of first year. Every year they cut people out that they don't think will make it. They hope for success for these individuals, but the MXAT is not the place for them. I knew it was a serious school, but I didn't know it was like that. It's good because it gets them prepared. "it's the business" - Sergei. It's just intense to think of getting kicked out of your program, not because you don't have talent, but because you're not there yet or whatever the case. Crazy. it's all crazy that I get to study here. Everyday I walk past lines of people in front of the MXAT just t audition to study here. Everday, huge lines, and I just walk by with my little card and go to class with the instructors they're dying to work with. They audition thousands a year and only take maybe 30. I'm extremely privileged to be have been able to have this opportunity. I know I keep saying this, but it's so true. I';ve sent myself here, and it's one of the best decisions I think I could have ever made. I've learned so much through acting, moving, singing, but also through culture, being in a different country and not knowing the language, handling myself in difficult situations, living with so many people, and being ok. :)

I'm about to go to bed. OH, the most important note of the day...I found a Starbucks. The lady of course had no idea what I was saying when I said carmel mocha, so I got a carmel latte, but still. AND...I have a London and Detroit Starbucks mug...well, I now have a Moscow one to join them. I was so excited that they had that. That was one of the only things I wanted to buy myself here, and I did. Lame, I know, but whatever. It's my thing I guess.

Alright, I'm off to bed. I just made chicken for tomorrow for dinner because we wont have time to come back to the dorms. It's done, so now I can go to sleep. Have a wonderful day. :)